How to deal with an old fashion mom?

i know that moms can sometime be unbearable and stuff but you still gotta love them. i respect my mom and all but i just don't agree with her on many things. one thing is dating *dum de DUM dum*. when my mom talked to me about that stuff, she told me that "i can start dating when i am in my masters degree" *translation* when i get out of college. O.o don't you think that's a lil too extreme? my mom doesn't want me to date in high school since she is afraid that i will date a boy, some girl will like that same boy, be jealous, then kill me....made sense right? i understand her concern and all BUT, i think she things i wont make the right chocies. i know my right from my left but she still thinks im an 8 year-old when it comes to those problems. my mom, like some moms, also want to know EVERY little detail that happens in my life. sometimes when i talk to her, it sounds like im being interrogated...when she ask why i don't talk about what happens im my life more often, its often because of one thing, she is a LOUD MOUTH.when i told her that, she replied "well, your life shouldn't be a secret. were all family and we HAVE to know each others lives."WTF?im a private person (unlike my mother eh-hem..) i don't want people that i don't know that well to know my life like a book. if something happened at home that my mom is aware of, the next day she will be shooting it off with her co-workers. she also want to control my life and what i choose to be my profession she wants me to be a doctortruthfully, the med field ain't up my lane. instead, i want to be something in the art field, like a cartoon designer or game designer my mom said no, i have to be a doctor. ehhh? i told my mother already that i DONT have aspirations for the medical field, i have dreams for the art field. when i asked my mom why cant I pursue my OWN dream, she replied "i never said you couldn't (hypocrite alert!) its just i wont pay for your college or support you for it. you have to wake up to reality. drawing is just YOUR hobby, you cant make a job out of that. your just a kid. when you grow up you'll understand."... B.S! reality woke me up a long long time ago! this was weird since when i talk to my mom about the cons of the things she does, she tells me "dont talk about that stuff. its like your trying to make me sad and angry on purpose." ... and she said that i need to know what 'reality' is, just look at her. during that conversation, i felt my insides melting, now i avoid all talks about the future. its so aggravating sometimes that my mother doesn't listen to a word i have to say. she is as stubborn as a donkey. almost nothing can change her mind.private life? she opens all files to the whole world. my family doesn't have any privacy with her around. i feel as if she is treating my life like some Sims game. wanting to control everything i do, what i do, and my future. she even told me that if she DOESNT like my future bf(s), she will make me break up with them and then FIND me a suitable husband that i can marry. (a.k.a. arrange marriage) i don't want to end up hating my mother but i find that everyday that passes by, i start loosing more respect for her. how do i deal with people like her? (and this was like an essay long, so thx for reading it!)

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7 Responses to “How to deal with an old fashion mom?”

  1. abnegating says:

    date when you want to **** what she says

  2. vinita says:

    Oh Kathy, Have you got problems.You don.t say how old you are but I’d guess you’re a teenager. I had a Mum like yours.I suggest that you use tact and outsmart her by telling her how much you love her and respect her but there is a difference between having secrets and respecting someones right to privacy.Tell her that you would tell her more if she didn’t then broadcast to other people.Remind her that John Lennon’s mum told him he’d never make a living playing guitar!Do some research on the money earned by people doing what you want to do. One of you will be convinced if it’s a good idea or not.Do you have the ability to be a doctor? Get a teacher to give you an assessment to show your mum what the odds are that you can do takes years of training and dedication. Ask yourself if you really have the talent to shine in a very competetive field. Again get someone unbiased to advise you. It isn’t the end of the world to take a paying job until you establish yourself in your chosen field.If you are determined you can do it.

  3. resigns says:

    you should open up to you school counselor about the whole future thing. its your future to decide and they will give you the advice you need (unbiased) to pursue what you want to do and ways to help your mom understand. also if your mom refuses to help pay there are always scholarships and grants to apply for that you can get that you don’t have to pay back like loans.once you’re 18 you are a legal adult, your mom cant make you break up with anyone or even tell you that you cannot date. and once you are gone out of her house it will be much easier for you to keep your life private.

  4. virose says:

    have 8 friends from collegeabout their Junior year – they all found that living off campus was cheaperhad 4 marriages 6 months laternone of the eight ever graduated collegesorry Mom is a pain – she ‘knows’tough loveall the best

  5. frypan says:

    It will not be until you are older that you realise that your Mum is right.If you date now you will ot concentrrate so much on your studies and could end up just being a single mum yourself. Get yourself and education then you can meet the right person. Young lads your own age just want one thing and it is NOT to settle down and be married!Love you Mum but also talk to her WITHOUT getting cross.

  6. miaous says:

    Move away from her. Have a serious sit down conversation and tell her how you feel.

  7. seminaristic says:

    when your of legal age move out.